Gravity? I’ll say. The Academy Awards is officially under threat of collapsing under the weight of its own pomposity. And while I, fancying myself a fledgling fashion blogger, was prepared to cope with acres of side cleavage, rainbow tulle and even dresses constructed entirely of paper, instead I was treated to a soggy red carpet and a parade of CPAs.
While it’s become commonplace to point out the lack of awards show risk taking in comparison with seventies style icons like Cher and Barbra Streisand, has anyone noticed the utter shift within the length of any given awards season? During the early portions of the season, the “Golden Globe” phase in which campaigning is still very much alive, we get the Hollywood glitter and sex. By the time the Academy Award come in, everyone pretty much knows how the chips have fallen, and we get a glimpse of the true business of the movie industry: BUSINESS.
The gloves come back on, and neon pink pantsuits transform into Dowager Valentino.
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| Amy Adams busting out at the Golden Globes |
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| And Oscar glum |
Google Images was aghast; I could scarcely even locate any photos of Amy Adams' Oscar dress with business accents at the bust and waist amidst all the unbuttoned silk of the rest of her season. Only her spackled red earrings and bulky rings dared whisper of seventies transgressiveness and plasticity -- and even then,one suspected, to stave off medical liability due to sudden lack of oxygen.
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| Life, the Universe |
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| And Oscar |
Finally, the universe swirled through“Sandy” Bullock’s January. But come March, SANDRA joined Amy in Power Navy in sombre procession through the Kodak.
“‘Discretion’ is ‘good taste,’ and discretion is also good business, since there are enough imponderables in Hollywood without handing the dice to players too distracted to concentrate on the action,” wrote Joan Didion in her 1973 essay on the movie business. Last night, the Hollywood power brigade reminded us what a respectable, boring bunch they really are.
All kidding aside.
But seriously, folks... There was a certain heaviness, if not seriousness, in most of the Academy Award/Oscar show as well as the majority of outfits. Not so much swirling and twirling this year. Where is the feathery Bork when we need her?
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